No Plans for Summer

For the first time in three years, my schedule is mine

Soon, the heat will beat down on us, the pools will open, and the sun will stay up until 10.

In many ways, these are the best days we’ll have all year. These are the days we feel the most free, the most human we’ll feel all year.

That freedom, though, is heavily reliant on the decisions of our past.

For me, this will be my first summer home since 2021. It feels like a decade ago now. I was a freelance writing, spending my days typing about the stock market and other nonsense.

It was really cool for a while. I could do whatever I wanted, and I did just that.

I took jobs when I wanted, meaning I could wake up at 11, go play golf, go to the pool, and still get a day’s work done before sunset. In a lot of ways, it was a dream job.

Eventually, though, I got sick of the freedom. I was working from home and rarely saw people. By the time winter rolled around, I was seasonally depressed — and then some.

Then I became a tour manager and the script flipped.

From then on, my summers were spent on the road, putting out fires and selling t-shirts. Working outside during festival season was brutal. The midwest truly is a hell hole come July and August.

After three years of that, I started missing that freedom. Being able to go inside when it got really sticky out was a nice benefit of being home. I missed those lazy days by the pool.

Now, I sit here in mid-May and look ahead at my schedule for the summer. Aside from the Indy 500, my friend’s wedding in July, and a Cedar Point trip a couple weeks later, my agenda is clear.

A past version of myself would’ve hated seeing such a light schedule. Now I can’t wait to spend our freest season with few commitments.

I like doing my own thing. I like being able to write everyday. I like the freedom.

In 2021, I had a lot less understanding of how to spend days, and weeks, and months. The moments of boredom are an opportunity to discover something new, either in the world or inside of yourself.

With age comes understanding, and I understand a lot more about life than I did three years ago.

So cheers to freedom, cheers to summer, and cheers to worries put behind us.