How much do we hear of “wasted potential”?
It’s life’s biggest shame, according to some. A kid with all the tools to succeed. The financial backing. The time. The God-given talent.
Where does all that potential go?
The truth is, “potential” is a total sham.
Life, and the success and failures we have within it, all come down to our decisions. It comes down to our knowledge. It comes down to our behavior. It comes down to our actions.
Potential has nothing to do with that.
Potential is what parents, grandparents, teachers, and other authority figures talk about to make themselves feel better. It’s them painting their own picture of us — tying us with expectations we didn’t ask for.
How many parents have forced their kids to play sports, or an instrument, or perform in plays, because they had the potential to be a great athlete, musician, or performer?
How much time was wasted pushing those kids in a direction they may not have wanted to go in?
I was lucky enough to be raised by parents that gave me a long leash. They encouraged me to do certain things. But I did nothing by force.
I was also lucky enough to discover at a very young age that I wanted to be a writer.
My destiny, it seems, has led me to this place — where I write about whatever I want, whenever I want, to whatever audience chooses to indulge.
For a time, when I was younger, I did look at my future as “potentially” great.
And it was at that time that I was at my worst. I wasn’t as good of a writer as I thought. I was lazy and somewhat entitled. I just knew I’d be something big someday, but I never followed through with the work to prove that feeling correct.
Now, I’m a lot better and I have zero expectations for my future. I have no potential.
I got to this point by writing. I also got here with help from that seed planted within me that wanted me to write. But that seed would never grow without the proper care.
My parents always supported my writing. But they never forced me into any sort of writing practice because of some great potential I had. It was what I wanted to do and they allowed me to do it, with no interference outside of an edit or two.
Potential means nothing without practice.
So, it’s hard to say that potential doesn’t exist. But it’s time we retire this vague term — and focus more on gently nurturing the seeds inside our kids and letting them choose their own paths.
Let them discover their own “potential” and allow them to reach whatever destination they may find on their own time. Let them learn the discipline — and find the will to fight their fight.